Worst Race Ever

My oldest daughter Kayley is a runner. She is part of a cross country co-op team and the only distance runner on her track team. She is very gifted in the sport and likes to remind me often of that truth.

Race Start

When I started running she had mentioned that possibly she would like to run a race with me. One day while at the gym I told her if she could put in three miles while I was taking my class she could pick the race for us to do. First mistake right there.
I fished my class and she them informed me that she had indeed ran her three mile quota and she was delighted to choose our race when we got home.
After researching races she thought it would be a fantastic idea for us the run the Color Vive Color Run.
They had dancing, lots of music, lots of colors, lots of craziness, I mean what's not to love about this rave that turns into a race??
We arrived early for this race and immediately I started to rethink this idea. There was a stage with loud thumping music with a dj speaking loudly to the crowd that had formed in front. He introduced a lady that was supposed to lead us through so pre-race exercises. By pre-race exercises I mean dance moves, we did the whip-nae-nae and some other moves that myself, being a tad bit older than the average age of the crowd had no idea what they were.
Then it happened.
Five, four, three, two, one and boom. Powder color was being thrown up in the air in all directions.

Pre-race "Exercises"

OH MY GOODNESS IT WAS EVERYWHERE, MY HAIR, MY BODY, GETTING BREATHED INTO MY LUNGS, IN MY MOUTH, IN MY EYES, IT. WAS. EVERYWHERE!!!!!
My daughter absolutely loved this, I was seriously just trying to keep from having a panic attack and losing my crap for real.
After this madness occurred we were shuffled over to the race start. At this time the temperature had began to rise and you know what happens when it's July and about 75 out. You start to sweat, especially me, as I was in a crown of people with no personal space.

Color Storm

Sweat mixed with blue, yellow, green and pink powder. Yep this was happening. Sweat running down with color turning to streaks of brown down my body.
After waiting what seemed like and eternity we finally heard the countdown and the race started.

Already uncomfortable I was trotting along with my sweet eleven year old when she decided to leave me. Yes, she decided that running with her mom was way to slow for her so she just left me, amongst all these crazy people with color smeared all over them.
While running the powder was beginning come off and I was starting to calm down a bit and then more evil occurred. As I passed the mile marker there were these really mean people squirting more powdered color on my person. Seriously, they tried to cover you in as much powder as humanly possible. It was horrific!!!!
This dastardly process occurred four more times. After getting it in my eye at mile three I was pretty much determined this has to be the worst race ever anyone could ever be involved with. I couldn't even wipe my eyes because my hands were all powdered. At this point in my morning I completely lost my crap and began to have a complete meltdown.
I stripped down in the parking lot in front of God and everyone else. I had powder everywhere clothed and unclothed and I could not get home fast enough to shower and swear off this race for all of eternity.

Her face = my feelings about this whole ordeal!!

Meanwhile my precious child was already making plans for running it next year with her two best running girlfriends, I expressed with absolute clarity that I AM OUT!!!!